I love happy endings...

But more than that, I love happy beginnings – the beginning of something beautiful, something that lasts a lifetime. I wish I saw it more often, but happy beginnings are becoming very rare these days. They do happen though, and since they occur less frequently, when one does come around, it’s that much more special.

Such was the case today. Two really wonderful people – one of them that I have known since high school – got engaged today. There was something so magical about it for me that I have yet to wipe the stupid grin off my face. It’s not that people never commit to marriage anymore, but these two people, both of whom have walked a sometimes difficult path in their respective lives, just kind of stumbled into love. They knew each other before the “love thing” hit them in the head like a bat, and they suffered through nagging doubts and trepidation because, let’s face it, the whole “sex/love/marriage” thing can be incredibly scary and overwhelming. It was for me when I met Bill, and subsequently started a relationship. But somehow, I always knew he was the one. I think my friends have had a very similar experience.

When you’re “slightly beyond 29,” you learn quickly what works and what doesn’t. I’ve tossed countless “first dates” aside because honestly, there was no point in pursuing something that was obviously pointless. It’s there or it’s not. You know instinctively, like when you know a thunderstorm is about to hit, or when you know that your child needs you, even though there is no outright indication. Instinct...more people should trust it, follow it. I wish I had trusted my instincts more in the past. After enduring the shame of two failed marriages though, I realize that it was my "path" to walk, my life journey. What I took away from those relationships was incredible learning experiences that lead me to exactly where I am supposed to be. Everything serves a purpose.

Bill has never been “work.” And while our relationship has not been picture perfect, our love has been rather effortless for me. He grounds me, centers me. He reminds me that sometimes I’m just a freaking nutcase who needs to stop and remember what’s really important in this world. I wouldn’t swear to it, but I do believe that I am the one who reminds Bill of similar things, as well as the fact that HE is important. He neglected himself and was overlooked in a loveless marriage for so many years, but now it is my mission to make sure that never happens again. For the most part, we waltz along our chosen path, content with each other and the life we are building together, for each other. It’s an amazing feeling, one that I never thought I would experience. Sometimes I have to pinch myself, just to make sure I remember that this real and remind myself that I deserve this...Bill and I both have earned it.

Congratulations Marie, and Wayne. I wish you EVERY joy and happiness together. May the thought of “growing old together” be as pleasant a thought as it has become for Bill and me. What you have is so special. People wait their whole lives for it and never find it. Nurture it, treasure it, and above all, remember that you have earned this.

I want a Pomeranian like Boo…

I’ve expressed my longing for an adorable ball of fur in the form of a Pomeranian that I can cart around in some ridiculously expensive doggy purse, but as usual, Bill is resisting. Big surprise, I know.

I didn’t always know that I wanted a Pomeranian. My first wistful thought of owning one occurred when my extremely evil friend Sherrel introduced me to the facebook page of a Pomeranian named Boo. Boo has 1.6 MILLION facebook fans, and if you take a look at his page, you can see why. He is an absolute ball of fluffy cuteness. And his owner entertains me with witty little quips under his pics. I am smitten. Boo even made it on the Today Show and Good Morning America to promote his new book, “Boo, the Life of the World’s Cutest Dog”. It’s amazing there aren’t more Pomeranians in the world, because he’s even cuter on TV than in photos.

So imagine my disappointment when Bill said “we are NOT getting a Pomeranian. If we get another pet, I am pulling an RV into the driveway and living in it. Five pets is more than enough.” I quickly reminded him that we used to have SIX pets, but my Pekingese, Marlen, tried to eat my daughter’s hamster at 4am one day. It wasn’t a good outcome. By the way, if anyone needs $500 worth of Ovotrail hamster paraphernalia, please let me know. I am damn sure we will not be getting another hamster. The violent demise of Mable was very traumatic.

So, I thought perhaps if I went down the road of “We USED to have six pets.” Bill would relent to my need for a Pomeranian...nope. He did not yield. He did not even waver in his response. He then informed me that when we do get another dog - apparently we have to wait until one of our other pets “takes the big dirt nap” - it will be a “hunting” dog, such as a beagle or a Jack Russell. Don’t get me wrong, beagles and Jack Russell’s are adorable, but in no way does their cuteness exceed that of a Pom. I told him I heard Pomeranians make excellent hunting dogs. He shook his head and rolled his eyes. Damn, I thought I was more convincing. . .apparently not.

I know I have a lot of pets. Currently, we are the parents of a Pekingese, a geriatric mixed breed dog, a cockatiel, a blue-headed pionus parrot, and a cockatoo who thinks she is a child (not even kidding a little.) They are all spoiled, all badly behaved, and all needy. But really, how much space can one more pet take up in the house? Poms are little, not even ten pounds. How much can they eat? I know my fifteen pound Pekingese’s poop isn’t much bigger than a rabbit. I would have to guess that Pom poop is even smaller. So many checks in the "win" column when it comes to Poms.

For now, Bill has won this battle. I don't have a choice really, so for now I'll just gaze at Boo's facebook page, and hope that someone leaves an adorable Pomeranian puppy on our doorstep.

I wonder how he’d feel about chinchillas?

And the ink isn’t even dry…

So today I heard that Kat Von D and Jesse James are engaged no more…Splitsville, moooooving on. Imagine my utter shock. Those two? Really? And here I thought it was going to last forever-what a crushing blow to romantics all over the world. I cannot wait to see what next world famous tattoo artist Mr. James move onto, or should I say into…I wonder if he gets a good deal on his ink?

Just one more seemingly perfect couple who has left us feeling robbed of “the happy ending.” Don’t you just love how these celebrities toss aside relationships like they are last season’s Prada? For those of us slightly beyond 25, we look at these dumba$$es and generally roll our eyes. The fact that anyone takes anything that comes out of their mouth as anything more than an momentary exuberant utterance is amazing. I just hope Ms. Von D was not gullible enough to have “Forever Jesse” emblazoned on the inside of her upper thigh. That’s going to leave a mark, especially on the next lucky fellow who finds himself “up there.” I guess the one statement that can be made about these lovebirds is at least the ended it before the deal was “inked.”

I was buoyed by a recent news story that said after many years of divorce steadily rising, it is now in fact on the decline. I can actually see that being the case, since no one, no matter how unhappy, can afford a decent divorce attorney these days. ($350-$500 an hour…really??? Damn, I should have gone to law school.) Let’s face it, there are those out there who just can’t afford to make the leap back into single life, so they choose to stay in an unhappy, loveless relationship…reduced to a lifetime of “hallway sex.” (If you need me to explain the definition of hallway sex, leave me a comment, and I will be happy to oblige.) I’m sad for those folks. What if they died tomorrow? No one should die that miserable. Life is just too short for that kind of tragedy. Ask Amy Winehouse…her boyfriend Reg left her, and now, well, let’s just say she’s feeling a bit “cold” about the whole thing.

Don’t get me wrong, I am in no way condoning divorce. While I am indeed divorced myself, I still believe in love and marriage. In fact, I have recently married my soul mate and “forever love” after what felt like a lifetime of searching. Being married to the right person is bliss. Being married to the wrong person is nothing short of hell (been there too.) Maybe that is why I feel that it should be really really hard to get married, and really easy to divorce. Isn’t it possible that if the act of marriage were as difficult as the act of divorce, most of us would consider it much more carefully? (Of course, given the amount of idiot parents out there, I kind of feel the same way about having children, but that is a whole other blog.)

So, Mr. James and Ms. Von D, along with Ms. Lopez and Mr. Anthony and others, please stop…stop having your publicists plan your weddings and subsequent divorces. As a matter of fact, stop naming your children ridiculous names. (Who names their kid Apple???) Just stop because mostly we find you boorish, and contrived, and morally and ethically bankrupt. And mostly, we just wish you’d go about your lives without making us live it right along with you. If you feel the need to live your lives so publicly, then go the route of others and make a reality show. At least we have the option of changing the channel.

Third time is the charm...

Somewhere between Walmart and the office on my way to work this morning, it hit me...I’m getting married...again...

Everyone keeps asking me “How do you know Bill is ‘the one’?” “Why are you going through this again?” “Are you crazy?” As a matter of fact, yes, I am, but that is another matter entirely. The more important question would be "Is Bill crazy???" The questions make me giggle, but I can see why people would think that maybe I have lost my mind. My track record is not stellar when it comes to the bonds of matrimony. But as I have often said, I cannot allow myself to have any regrets, because every decision I have made in my life has led me to this very spot, this exact moment. I have become the person I am because of the choices I have made, and by and large, I am incredibly happy with who I am. There is always room for improvement, but still, as a package...not bad. Bill, on the other hand...well, I am truly the lucky one. Other than my father, I have never met a man as solid and as pure of heart as Bill. There is no doubt he is the kindest, humblest, most ethical man I have ever known. He is honest to a fault, and loyal to his friends and family always. He also loves my daughter like his own, and for that I am so very thankful. He is handsome, and sexy, and very very young at heart. Indeed, he still "gives me butterflies."

It was easy to realize that marrying Bill is absolutely the right thing to do. How can I be so sure? It’s simple...he is the only man I have ever, in my entire life, pictured myself growing old with. As someone who can barely deal with a new wrinkle on her face (vanity runs deep through these veins) the thought of getting older has not exactly been a pleasant point to ponder, until I met Bill. Maybe life is all in the timing, but we seem to have met at a very important crossroad in our lives. We were both closing chapters on less than perfect relationships, and we were both looking for someone whose company we could enjoy - a happy, simple and uncomplicated pairing. Of course, as any man would tell you, if there is a woman in the mix, it is rarely uncomplicated. But while far from perfect, I have overcome a lot of those "womanly charms" that drive men batty. To me, jealousy is wasted energy, so I do not indulge those thoughts on any level. I am secure in who I am, and what I bring to the table. If my partner cannot see that, then he is not the person for me. Bill appreciates the fact that I don’t mind if he glances at an attractive woman, or that I don’t take offense if a member of the opposite sex approaches him in conversation - on the contrary, I like that other women find him appealing. Honestly, I have always felt that I know who I came with, and I know who I am leaving with, so to treat the situation differently would indicate a lack of trust in Bill, and I trust Bill implicitly. I also have learned in my forty-six years that I enjoy the silence, so I never feel the need to bombard Bill with non-stop chatter. We are both good with sitting quietly, knowing that just being together is sometimes enough. We work well together, almost always happily synchronized with each other, We laugh at each other’s jokes and finish each other’s sentences. I am happy to give Bill the space he needs to do the things he loves, and he is always willing to allow me the same courtesy. We share a world of interests, but we also have those things that are ours alone. It’s ok to be separate, something else I have learned. What makes us different also helps to keeps us interesting and just a bit mysterious to our mate, and as a woman, there is nothing I like more than being just a bit mysterious.

We have learned much about each other and ourselves as a couple in three years. I cannot remember what my life was like before I met Bill, and I cannot imagine one moment of my life without him. He is my rock. He keeps me centered and grounded, and he makes me very very happy. In this day and age, it is so rare to find that one person who captures your heart completely. Bill carries my heart around in his back pocket. He knows that, and is always careful not to break such a precious possession.

So yes, I am excited about marrying my Bill. This is a good thing, for us, for our children, and for our future. I am excited about the possibilities, and I look forward to a lifetime of laughter, truly blessed moments, and sometimes tears too. I want to share it all with him. And someday, far far down the road, I hope I am the one to look into his eyes and take my last breath, because I never want to wake up and have him not be next to me. This is real, folks. But as they say, Better late than never.

And no, I’m not wearing white - ivory is a more appropriate choice. But I really do believe that the third time is the charm.